I never expected this.

All my life I thought of Australian males as icons of masculinity.

You know what I mean. They could always perform. In bars. In bed. For all we knew, in scrums.

Now we find out it isn't so.

An Australian oyster farmer in the village of Patonga Beach, located just north of Sydney, has started feeding Viagra to his oysters.

Among his patented names for them is Sydney Rock Hard Oysters—and he's not talking about the shell.

And I always thought that men living down under never needed help getting it up.

Got a beef with Alan Richman?
In need of food-and-wine advice? E-mail him at AlanRichman@GQ.com. He’ll respond each week right here on ‘Forked’