A Relaxing Glass of Wine
A Relaxing Glass of Wine
Good for him.
When I find such a wine, this is what I tell consumers: Chill. Drink.
Not him.
This is what he says it looks like: "…star-bright core going out into a faint glass-clear rim definition with almost unreal high viscosity…"
This is what he says it smells like: "…fresh notes of crushed white fruit from pomelo, white cranberries, stone rose, white flowers, Asian pear, and subtle hints of rose and white corn…"
This is what he says it tastes like: "…ultrasuave with a sweetish pear and white currant entry followed by citrus rind, dried apricots, buttery anise components…"
This is how to serve it: "…at 53 degrees Fahrenheit…"
In a way, I kind of love this guy. I mean, how many wine critics care so much that they want their beverages served with a thermometer instead of a swizzle stick?
Unfortunately, this kind of pedantry makes people hate wine. It's time to do something about him. I suggest a couple of mob guys take his palate out to the desert and bury it.
Got a beef with Alan Richman?
In need of food-and-wine advice? E-mail him at AlanRichman@GQ.com. He’ll respond each week right here on ‘Forked’
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kily2008
Jan 18, 2008 3:25:01 AM
This guy sounds more like a failed novelist than a wine critic. The review kind of reminds me of the School House Rock song "So I unpacked my adjectives".
Matthew_maurice
Jan 20, 2008 2:13:03 AM
Ha! I found a bottle of this stuff at my local supermarket, so I picked it up. I've got my thermometer all ready, and I'm looking forward to it's "unreal high viscosity". I had to pay $12, though.
matthew_maurice
Jan 22, 2008 10:34:03 PM
Hey, I remember you -you and Nina Grisom used to be restaurant critics on Food TV. You both were good. I also remember that you chose garlic over wine if you had to choose between the two. I can't believe what some wealthy people are bidding for on some choice years and vintages. The geneticists are saying the true flavor does not come from the soil or the climate. They can make the stuff cheaply. A wino on the streets can get the same $250,000 auctioned price wine for a dollar. Now,that's what equality in America has come to. And who cars if you aren't born a rich heir? The finance whiz kids have ruined global economies by just having to be trust-fund babies,too. These SIV gurus are sinking America faster than a fully-stocked wine cellar on the Titanic.
nance60
Jan 23, 2008 4:43:18 PM