Q: What do you do for jeans? I’ve been trying to buy some lately, but every pair I see seems to have grommets on the crotch, a super-low waist, weird back pockets, and flared legs. I just want basic straight-leg jeans, and unfortunately Levi’s 501s don’t fit me so well.

A: It’s getting tougher now, what with Helmut Lang disappearing from the scene. But remember, blue jeans were invented for workers, so why not get workingman’s jeans? They do the job for me. Got a Sears nearby? Or a good work-clothes store? I wear Carhartt jeans and dig the unadorned utility, good quality, and sensible price. And let us not forget the jeans that the real cowboys wear: Wranglers. I’ve got a pair and find them cool in their naturally worn, undesigner fashion. They rise high enough that you won’t lose ’em if thrown by a bull. Increasingly, designer jeans mean jeans that show your ass crack, even if you have a slim physique and not the usual plumber’s butt.

September 2005

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